Traffic Renegades

Man invented wheel and his life started moving round in circles. The invention of the wheel added revolutions to the human life. It is hard to imagine life without wheels. It also paved way for transport system and traffic. Initially, people were obeying traffic rules and roads were safe. Then some mutation occurred in genes of some, and a class of traffic renegades was born. They have this inherent quality of breaking the traffic rules. They are omnipresent and come in all sizes, shapes and gender.

There are many sub-classes.

Red Light Jumpers

One can find such restless, impatient people on every crossing. While everyone else is waiting for the light to turn green, such people keep moving forward inch by inch. And they vroom across the line when the timer on the lights is showing only few seconds left for it to turn green. He gets traction and couple of other motorists follow him, as if on cue. Traffic policeman standing in one corner is so bored looking at the lights and vrooming kind, that he has stopped registering the scene. I always wonder what they will achieve in those extra 5-7 seconds that they gained by jumping light.

It is wise and sometimes lifesaving, to look left and right before crossing an intersection, even if it is green light.

Elbow Savers

Helmets do not discriminate. They save all the heads and brains irrespective of the IQ. People with good functional IQ understand the importance and always wear the helmet. Those with questionable IQ, wear it only when they anticipate a traffic policeman at a specific point, otherwise it is slung over the arm. May be for the low IQ people, the elbow is more precious than the brain.

Double Liners

Traffic gets stuck for some reason. Some hyper driver at the back suffers an uncontrollable impulse to break the queue and drives right up to the queue head, to the point of obstruction. Many behind him, or in the original queue, get influenced and rush to tail him. Soon there are two parallel lines of vehicles. Give sometime and someone more adventurous will start a third line. And if the solution to the jam is to let the opposite traffic flow on the same road, there results absolute grid lock because there are equally adventurous drivers on the opposite side also.

Belt Evaders

Seat belt is four-wheeler safety equivalent of helmet. The respect bestowed upon it is almost same as the helmet. Same IQ equation. And as if to help low IQ behavior of not using the seat belts, snap on implements are available in the market that go into the seat belt slot and silent the alarm. Steering wheel becomes the shattering wheel for ribs, in case of impact.

Rail Track Invaders

Remember the railway crossings where poles swing down and block the road traffic for train to pass? There is no dearth of people on two wheelers who tilt their vehicles and pass below the poles to cross the railway tracks. They have no urgent work on the other side. Just the non-urgent urge. They were not there to catch the train, but many a times, train catches them.

Mobile Texters

As if attending calls while driving was not dangerous enough, people are seen reading text messages and typing replies also. It is tragic when they start typing a sentence and full stop is added by the doctor in the emergency.

Drunk and Happy

Drive at night only if absolutely necessary, for, the proportion of drunk drivers increases many fold after sunset. They are in a different space and orbit. Many a poles, road dividers and fellow travelers have suffered the misplaced sense of confidence and adventure.


These are the guys who will drive on the wrong side of the road or in the opposite direction in one way street, for no reason at all. They will drive zig zag in between other vehicles and overtake from the wrong side. I guess they learnt their driving through video games and believe that they have three lives.

Come on guys, you might be superhumans, but majority people on roads are lesser humans like me. Do not endanger our lives by your stupidities.



Views expressed above are the author’s own.


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